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Hating is a double-edged sword
Dec. 14th, 2024 11:08 amThis should be something I should actually be discussing with the people I will be referring to in this post rather than posting it as a personal rambling, but you'll see why I don't do that in a moment.
Everyone has characters, ships or simply things they don't like and/or that they hate, and so do I. It's a completely normal feeling because, hey, I think it's pretty difficult for someone to completely like everything in a franchise, for example, especially when it has a lot of characters and sometimes you simply can't keep up with everyone's lore, like how it happens in certain mobile games that expand their content as time goes on. And just as it happens with loving characters, sometimes hating things can be a way of bonding with others... Except not really, in my experience.
When people hate things, I've usually encountered three different attitudes: those who are open about it independently of their followers (which is completely valid. If I like something and someone doesn't, I can just avoid it by myself), those who go out of their way to tag any sort of hate (the tagging also helps other people avoid it)... And then there's the people who don't usually namedrop what they're hating on because they have friends who like it but everyone can tell (whether because they're quote-retweeting something clearly referencing), including said people.
By itself, this isn't usually a big problem — I mean, yeah, a little annoying to encounter, but it's not hard to just scroll and ignore it. The real problem starts when then said people are actually bothered by others hating on the things they like the same way or literally in any way, so then you end up with people subtly hating on things you like, then telling you they don't actually hate them only for you to encounter another hate tweet right in your timeline.
So what does this have to do with bonding over hating? I feel like this happens because most of their friends dislike the thing, so they share that, but in turn, they don't respect when others do that. Having observed and suffered that, I concluded what's in the title: hating is a double-edged sword. If you thread too thin, in the end you're just going to come off as the asshole, and while I usually take measures myself so I don't have to see it, I don't have to have to mute the things I do like so I don't see hate for them, and if they censor it, I'm going to end up seeing it, anyway. Hating is a double-edged sword, because if you aren't ready to receive the same treatment you give others, it's going to hurt. And what happens if someone starts to like what they used to hate?
To sum up, I don't mind if my friends have different taste than mine, because that's just how different people are. But if you're going to hate on something, commit to it and don't do it halfway, and be ready to encounter hate in return. This is why I don't usually comment on things I dislike, even if I do have them. I simply prefer to bond by loving things. Also, if you like something I don't, that's okay! I'm open to different opinions, and again, I'll simply focus on what I like. But this has been a recurring problem in a few spaces (not here), and I don't know what to do about it anymore...
Everyone has characters, ships or simply things they don't like and/or that they hate, and so do I. It's a completely normal feeling because, hey, I think it's pretty difficult for someone to completely like everything in a franchise, for example, especially when it has a lot of characters and sometimes you simply can't keep up with everyone's lore, like how it happens in certain mobile games that expand their content as time goes on. And just as it happens with loving characters, sometimes hating things can be a way of bonding with others... Except not really, in my experience.
When people hate things, I've usually encountered three different attitudes: those who are open about it independently of their followers (which is completely valid. If I like something and someone doesn't, I can just avoid it by myself), those who go out of their way to tag any sort of hate (the tagging also helps other people avoid it)... And then there's the people who don't usually namedrop what they're hating on because they have friends who like it but everyone can tell (whether because they're quote-retweeting something clearly referencing), including said people.
By itself, this isn't usually a big problem — I mean, yeah, a little annoying to encounter, but it's not hard to just scroll and ignore it. The real problem starts when then said people are actually bothered by others hating on the things they like the same way or literally in any way, so then you end up with people subtly hating on things you like, then telling you they don't actually hate them only for you to encounter another hate tweet right in your timeline.
So what does this have to do with bonding over hating? I feel like this happens because most of their friends dislike the thing, so they share that, but in turn, they don't respect when others do that. Having observed and suffered that, I concluded what's in the title: hating is a double-edged sword. If you thread too thin, in the end you're just going to come off as the asshole, and while I usually take measures myself so I don't have to see it, I don't have to have to mute the things I do like so I don't see hate for them, and if they censor it, I'm going to end up seeing it, anyway. Hating is a double-edged sword, because if you aren't ready to receive the same treatment you give others, it's going to hurt. And what happens if someone starts to like what they used to hate?
To sum up, I don't mind if my friends have different taste than mine, because that's just how different people are. But if you're going to hate on something, commit to it and don't do it halfway, and be ready to encounter hate in return. This is why I don't usually comment on things I dislike, even if I do have them. I simply prefer to bond by loving things. Also, if you like something I don't, that's okay! I'm open to different opinions, and again, I'll simply focus on what I like. But this has been a recurring problem in a few spaces (not here), and I don't know what to do about it anymore...
